her vagine was all disorganized.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Randomize
