what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize