Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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