i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
