Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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