we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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