Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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