yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize