make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
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