so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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