He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
