So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
True but thats because hes a fetus.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
