I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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