I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
