don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
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