totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize