So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I intend to get homeless drunk
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I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
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Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I just want to make out with him forever
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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