Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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