Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (762): View more from Georgia

  Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (762): Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once... http://tfl.nu/ks2u
  Replies (53) Good night (4705) Bad night (791)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you

  (386): View more from Florida

  girlfriend?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you (386): girlfriend? http://tfl.nu/fzzr
  Replies (21) Good night (841) Bad night (9414)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers

  (1-402): View more from Nebraska

  are you high?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers (1-402): are you high? http://tfl.nu/fjf1
  Replies (36) Good night (12485) Bad night (895)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol. http://tfl.nu/c7jp
  Replies (48) Good night (768) Bad night (6163)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have? http://tfl.nu/03l6
  Replies (23) Good night (3160) Bad night (1606)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex. http://tfl.nu/3ix3
  Replies (19) Good night (2373) Bad night (6111)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet" http://tfl.nu/r96p
  Replies (3) Good night (2249) Bad night (822)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears. http://tfl.nu/gqzu
  Replies (8) Good night (1985) Bad night (3997)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay. http://tfl.nu/xs17
  Replies (16) Good night (1574) Bad night (2891)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore http://tfl.nu/r45j
  Replies (14) Good night (2798) Bad night (956)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (502): Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer. http://tfl.nu/e067
  Replies (11) Good night (1363) Bad night (989)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything? http://tfl.nu/t3z5
  Replies (24) Good night (2651) Bad night (808)
• Favorite

  (289): View more from Ontario

  Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (289): Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player. http://tfl.nu/90yv
  Replies (5) Good night (757) Bad night (537)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me. http://tfl.nu/rph6
  Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college http://tfl.nu/kc8a
  Replies (2) Good night (760) Bad night (272)

Randomize