I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator