all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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