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• (818): View more from California

  Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.

  (818): View more from California

  Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.

  (818): View more from California

  And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  not the best booty call

  (1-217): View more from Illinois

  did she squirt?

  (217): View more from Illinois

  only if tears count

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• 

  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month

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  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.

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• (904): View more from Florida

  It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet

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• (924): View more from

  He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.

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