Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
