My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
