Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
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I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
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Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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