Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
