Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
