Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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