I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
