By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.