You're my little dorito
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize