At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
