we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Randomize
