Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Randomize
