K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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