I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize