note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
this is an emotional support booty call
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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