She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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