my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
