I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
