8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
zippers are such a cool invention
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
