i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize