I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize