Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
