She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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