Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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