man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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