Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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