I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
