I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize